met up with belle
watch FD3.
not really that scary as described by shermain
but well its rather heart stopping at times
=)
shopp`d ard
tempted to buy a bag
but no..
wait till next month. no money alr
just shop`d on sat. =/
haas.

am so freakin tired.
at times i just wish to disappear from the world
hide at a corner. nobody to come near me
nobody talk to me ; nobody disturb me
my insecurities is eating me alive

sometimes the word friends make me wonder
what does it truly mean!?
what does it stands for?
i have more than enough friends ; accquaintances
who truly understand me
who truly cares fer me

i aspire to be a ballerinaaa. =)

GOODBYE OASIS

my tto just went down the hill
30 marks worth of calculation just gone with the wind
im so dead la
i really can just bang the wall and die please!
better still save me the trouble
KILL ME!!
i know its silly to say i was near to tears
but i was really near to tears
30 marks lei
FARKING THIRTY MARKS!!!
watever shermain said must look forward and don dwell on the past
haas
2 more papers have to look forward
pom is simply boring me to death
so much to read
4 more chapters.

reached home changed and went to buy new contact lens solution w mei
haas. news abt RENU is scaring her. i dont even give a damn. LOL
thou i have new solution i`ve yet to throw my 1/4 RENU away.
=/ lazy la
came home rest a lil
dear came over
he slack`d ; watch tv ; played games
while i was STUDYING!
bahhhhhhhhhhhh.

cant wait fer exams to be over
so can spend more time with him
just when he is free fer me
wanting to meet me aft his work ; meet me fer dinner
im busy with exams
how cool is it hur.
sorry dear ; din want things to be this way too
if you felt neglected ; im really sorry
will make it up to you SOON!
=)
friday is just round the corner

gotta get back to studying soon
anyway felix say i dont have to be sad anymore
hmmmm. does that means................
keke.

all the best for your interview tml. lots of love

stress
dunno what tto is talkin about
im so fried
just a short break away from all the dont make sense notes
all the different itinerary ; tour operators
its making me go nuts!!!
watever
bstats paper down
hypothesis killed me
18 marks gone.
WOOHOO!!

anyway aft paper today was talkin to him
he suggested we have dinner tgt
=)
it has been long since he said lets have dinner tgt
so went home bathe and all and met him fer dinner
MY CLAYPOT RICE!!! yummy
was so full la
even had my ice cream
prissy is one happy ger today
another happy fact saw my mystery guy in sch today!
i was ELATED!!! haasss.
think im gg nuts
aiights its time to go back to TTO!!!
930 paper tml. no more oversleeping i hope!
i cant afford! =/

have been studyin fer the past 2 days in tpy library
well. i did studied.=)
am a good ger k
anyway last night couldnt concentrate on finishing my tto
inspiration came so this is what i wrote

im really lazy to study la
that`s why i say i cant study at home
comp and tv and food and everything
i can never get dwn to studying
whatever

anyway i wanna talk abt my trip to the zoo ytd
omg!! i just realise i have a liking fer spotted animals
cheetahs ; giraffes ; leopards
whatever
THEY ARE REALLY BEAUTIFUL!!
they are really really pweeeeety..
super super pweetttyyyy
haas. i cant help but goin gaga over it.
anyway puma is pretty too thou it does not have spots.
guess i have a liking fer BIG cats too.
maybe i`ll get a cat too
and invite AMANDA SOH to my hse to PLAY WITH THE CAT
haha. i know she will kill me.
but she loves me too much to do so. keke
animals i like
i really wanna go back again
do you know i have been pestering my dear to go zoo with me fer one year
and we haven been there tgt yet
BAHHHHHHHHHH
just feel like strangling him
anyway i really love sea lions.
they are freakin cute
i will post up pics soon ; the one where carlos kiss`d me
fishy breath thou
haha

anyway exams really sucks. i hate it to the core
i wanna burn the person`s eye lash who started with this whole exam thing
that tortured me fer my entire life
and every single students ; adults life

aiights guess its oni fair to update a lil

tues was horrid as i was debating w myself
to meet or not to meet.
so aft some persuading to get out of the house
went fer ice cream and i pop by dear`s hse aft tat
shop`d at ntuc to get watever we need fer lunch ; dinner
start`d cooking aft a lil rest as my precious have not eat a single thing
and it was alr 5 pm
cant bear to see him get hungry
we prepared the food tgt ; cooked tgt
and yupz finally our dinner`s ready
watch`d 2 weeks notice as we eat our delicious dinner
haas.
slack`d till abt 1030 he sent me home

well well ; to some it may not be very romantic
i know to me it aint too
but at least we spent time tgt on this very special day
when all couples are parading their vday gifts ; flowers on the streets
we are tgt in his cosy home enjoying each others company.
=)
guess he felt bad that we cant enjoy ourselves fully on this day
he msg`d me and told me that he will make it up to me
and that`s totally sweet of him. =)
i will be waiting fer that day to come dear. =)

am happy fer my frens cause they had a merry vday too.
sometimes just so jealous ; if oni dear was.......
haas. but he never will be
aiights never say never but maybe not
haas. my fav sentence.

watever it is
am gonna go full blast studyin alr
mon to wed was play day
thurs to sun is study day
=(
just simply hate exams.

i wanna snuggle next to you right now.

the clock strikes 12 and yes its vday
happy vday peeps

last yr this time i was at esplanade
and got attached to my baby
but this year this time
i aint exactly feeling happy.
tears cant help but keep clouding my eyes
i dunno why
i never felt so sad ; hurt ; disappointed in my whole entire life
shld i really meet you?
thou its just slacking over ur place
i really dunno
like wat carol says i will regret when the day is over
but b4 da day is over i just cant get into the mood fer some love
haiz. if oni he can have some surprise fer me
simple things like appearing at my door step w mac breakfast will be sweet enough
but somehow this kinda thing can nv happen
watever la
i dunno la
i just have no mood fer vday this year
nothing done fer my pals. sorry.

i guess i love you too much to be able to put up with all this for an entire year
guess it just explains why its so hard to let go
last yr vday was really wonderful
really really lovely
if oni this year`s could be like this.
its impossible
you will never know how much tears i`ve shed fer this relationship
you will never know.

Just because someone doesn't love you in the way you want them to, doesn't mean that they don't love you with all they've got.

i totally agree with that sentence but i just hope you could love me the way i want to once in a while.

aiights
i dunno wat more shld i expect
i hoped to have some surprise or so
but apparently ; you have yet disappoint me again
i know things are gg rather bad fer u
its hard to make ends meet
u say u got no money to go out
fine!
but u said something that hurt me bad
" you die die want go out? "
its vday ; its our one yr anniversary
dont go out with you dan go out w other guys meh?
wtf la
if its any other day or occasion dan forget it
but its out 1 yr anniversary fer christ sake!!!
thou it may not be special to u
it is special to me
my first 1 yr anni w anybody k!!!
looks like somebody dun appreciate it
fine.
even no money we can also go on super budget dates wat
but did u even think of dat?
i just want to be with you ; be supper happy on dat day
i dun need roses ; expensive gifts ;chocolates ; soft toys
i just want u to be near and tell me you love me
you say u dun wan go out ; want stay home
fine ; at least suggest things like renting vcds and slack infront of tv tgt
but NO!!! none of this came out.
fine ; i dun expect anything else from you anymore
im done with disappointment
sometimes i really wonder where in the world you put me in your life
you do things wout telling me
like new hair cut
ask u when u cut ur hair?
oh i did dat long time ago
how hurtful can it be?
long time ago and u can even take 1 min to sms me to let me know that u are gg to cut hair
or u have cut ur hair
guess im not a good enuff gf fer u
all i do is complain and complain and complain
watever.
another 3 more weeks till end of feb
maybe taking a break will do us some good
at least to me.

you will never know how much i cried over this r/s
maybe you dont even care..................

watch`d i not stupid too.
pretty nice. it touched my heart.
it just reflect most of singaporeans life.
adults ; children ; students
the 5 of us tear`d in the cinema.
LOL!! no tissues lor. it was a messy scene.
watever

rush`d off to meet LANcers fer dinner
just as i step`d into the train
jiam msg came ; she`s not joining us fer dinner
BAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
just when chin is here ; jiam cant make it
WHEN WILL THE COMPLETE LANCERS OUTING BE?
anyway went to pizza hut fer dinner
it was freakin filling!!!
talk`d alot. really miss them alot.
this friendship is really hard to come by.
they are really the frens that will cry with me ; smile with me
they will stick by me no matter wat
i will nv forget 29 oct 2004
we hug`d tgt and cried
the day will be etched in my heart so deeply.
this friendship aint fake. they feel my every joy and pain.
anyway just hope that this kinda dinner will happen more often.
at times i just feel so distant away from them
alot of things can happen in one year. =/
watever it is i love my lancers!!! <3

pieces of me.
torn apart.
i dunno wat i want.
i wonder if i can really hang on.

do i really appear that single and available just like wat yinki said?
i dunno ; shrugs
but its almost a year
yes my heart screams i love you
but my mind tells me its time to let go
hate it when they are at war.

sometimes somethings just wont change no matter how much time is given
rite?
i dunno.
i really dun feel attached ; or in love
its just hanging there
i want to let go ; you said NO!
but u aint doin anything to make me change my mind.
so WAT FOR hang on?! RITE?
i dunno.....

FARK ALL THE THOUGHTS!!!

so lazy to blog.
nth interesting happened as well.
friday din go sch ; no tut ma
met up w belle darling at heeren
went fer lunch and we contd talkin while waiting fer my turn at the bank.
aft dat travel`d dwn to bugis
came home abt 7 plus fer dinner
aft dat tried to study fer psyco.
apparently nothing works oni had one chapter done
aft survival ; i went full blast to study!
45 mins online as a lil break
studied till 430. =)

thank god i made it in time fer my test.
i even had time fer breakfast. =)
test was baddd. just couldnt apply watever studied into the qns.
hate application qns!!!
did project fer awhile ; met shermain and wanyi fer lunch
went dwn to orchard to contd w my account opening.
back to msh fer lunch and ang bao.
$10 bucks lei. woohoo!!!
went over to nat lib and slack while waiting fer yinki.
met her to shop over at suntec.
guess wat? 9 pm felix called and us to go pavillion
we were in a dilemma. bahhhhh.
in the end decided to forgo our newton circus and go pavillion.
came home changed and cab`d down.
and guess wat?! it was such a let down.
we went bcuz of his cousin and she left by the time we were there.
=( bahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
din drink much. crowd was bad. familiar faces were all over the place.
like some kinda gathering liddat bah.
saw mandy and alyy there. =)
woots. miss them tons man.
hui xiang too. haas.
anyway reach`d home abt 330.
and i swear i`ll nv go back to pavillion again
waste of money. =/
haas.

aiights new year been crazy.
am so tired. my peeps came over my place juz now.
=)
enli ; joel ; wan yi ; shermain ; aggy ; yinki ; felix ; tim
yupz. we travel`d tgt on 8 to my place.
scandal on the bus hur. mwahaahaa.
yupz. blackjack all the way. dinner and back to blackjack.
aft dinner felix and aggy left soon.
haas. din get to play that much.
cuz i was talking to ting and tc. =)
felt real bad cuz i din really bother abt my precious.
haiz.
watever.
abt 9 ma peeps left ; came back talk`d more to ting and tc.
we better meet up soon. i really miss talkin to you guys!!!
haiz. i also dunno wat to blog abt.
sent dear to busstop.
somehow felt that there aint any plans from him fer vday.
if its any other day ; forget it!
but its vday ; our 1 yr anniversary.
it aint any other day. i dunno la.
totally no mood la. watever la.
yes i shld know better dat he`s liddat. but still it hurts.
watever la. watever la.

projects all done. left psyco presentation next week.
psyco test this week.
and dan i gotta go full blast fer studying!
i needa pass my yr1. haas. =)